My Life-From the Bee to West Nile Virus!

My last update was about my depression.  Well, it turns out that it's not just depression.  Sure, that's part of, but the main part is that when I was in Denver, CO in July, I got West Nile!  Yep!  27 mosquito bites later, and one of them managed to give it to me!  It's not the dangerous kind where you end up hospitalized, but the safe kind where you don't even know you have it... it's the middle one.  It takes between 2 and 6 months to get out of your system!!  EEK!!

Craziness, right?  Some days I feel completely normal.  Thankfully those days are coming more and more often! (I had two this month!), but most of the time I'm tired.  Really tired.  Bring the Bee's toys in, stay in bed, and don't do anything except feed and change the Bee until my Honey gets home tired.  But it's been a while since I had a day that bad!  YAY!!

The depression is part of it.  One thing I didn't realize about depression is how all encompassing it is.  You not only have the physical pain that comes with it, but you also have nothing.  Not a desire to do something, not any energy, no desire to see friends or family, etc.  Depression is selfish.  It's all consuming.  But, it's also not something that is avoidable.  I think everyone in the world gets depressed from time to time.  Could be work, could be family, could be friends, could be all of it, could be none of it.  It's just want happens.  We live in a fallen world, and it sucks.  Life is hard, sad, and impossible without God. Thankfully, I have God.  And he got me through it!  Sure, I'm still sad, sometimes.  Sure, my immune system is weakened, so I'm sick more often.  But, being as depressed as I was has already been used for His good.

I have been blessed to be able to see what's going on with my dad in a different light (prayers for him are still appreciated!  He starts his (PRAYERFULLY) last dose of steroids on Saturday and then his last dose of Chemo 30 days after that.) and offer insight to those closest to him.  I couldn't imagine fighting this disease with depression.  The Chemo and steroids make him so sick to begin with, and  then being depressed on top of it!  The fact that he actually gets up every day and fights (even if only for a few minutes) is amazing!

The Bee is now 19 months old!  We had her pictures taken for her 18 month birthday (well, okay, we did it for my 29th birthday! (they are the pictures scattered throughout this post)  It's amazing how much she has grown.  She's happy, cheerful (unless she's not, hehehe) and so amazing!  She blows me away with how much she's learning and loving and growing!  You can't walk out the door (even to take out the trash) without several bye bye hugs and kisses.  Fish lip kisses!  They are the sweetest thing!  And she love her sweet "friends" (stuffed animals, baby dolls, and little people!) giving them kisses and "hug" all the time.  And what's more amazing?  My 19 month old shares :).  You just have to ask her for something, and she'll joyfully pass it over!  Mostly she loves her Daddy and "Dog Dog".  Ember is so patient with her, with the constant desire for a hug and kiss. 

The Bee's favorite animal is still the giraffe, which she now calls "Raff".  Her favorite thing in the world to do is go to the Boise Zoo and feed Julius the Giraffe.  She could spend all day there, but at $3 per piece of lettuce, we limit it to 3 pieces!  Luckily she's still free and Thursdays are half price!  We're probably done with the zoo until it gets warmer.  Julius can't come out unless it's 40 degrees or warmer, so unless we have another warm streak, we are gonna hang out until summer :)

She's started naming her stuffed animals, with her Lambie being "Manny", her lady bug pillow pet is "Bug", a tiny white dog is "Woo Woo" (her sound for barking) and the latest addition, a while polar bear named "Rarrr".

Going over to my parents house is great fun for her, not only because Grandma ma and Papa are there, but because that's where "Giget" (my parents dog, Gidget) lives.  She has a great time at the other set of grandparents too, and is in love with all the bears and Grandma and Grandpa Bear have out... Plus, the baby toys and doll house amaze her! 

My brother in law is getting married this spring, and Jeremiah and I will go from having 2 nieces and 2 nephews to having 4 nieces and 2 nephews!  I'm so excited for him and his lovely bride! They are such a sweet couple.

Well, I think that's about it... you're all updated and informed :)

Life Is Short, Hug Your Kids, And Parents!

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My dad had a stroke today.  As I rushed to the hospital, in a constant state of prayer, several things flashed through my mind.  Mainly how much Abi loves her "PaPa" and how crushed I would be if she didn't get to grow up with him in her life.
It made me think of loosing my Grandpa, when I was 5, and how I only have one memory of him... the sadness I feel when people tell me stories about him, things I never knew.
I do not want Abi to face this future with her PaPa. 
I was also amazed at how instantly God answers prayer.  Mom called me as I was 1/2 way there and asked me to run out to their house because Dad had been going fishing and everything was just left in the truck.  As I raced down the streets, praying for people to get out of my way, and lights to turn green, tears streaming down my cheeks, I was amazed at how precisely He answered my prayers.  I barely had time to think them, and people were signaling their turns, lights were turning green, and my heart was calmed.  So faithfully were people moved out of my way that I marveled at it.  I love that God loves me.  I know that God loves my Daddy.  In fact as I was thinking, driving, and praying, I was amazed at how MUCH God must love us.  Because I love my daughter.  I would do ANYTHING it took to protect, heal, or keep her safe.  The phrase moving heaven and earth comes to mind.  I have no doubt that I would literally do it for Abi.  And God's love for us is MORE than we could ever love someone on this earth.
This thought it was kept me calm.  That no matter how much I love my dad, or my daughter, or husband... Jesus loves them more!
Anyway, Dad is doing much better!  He had his speech back by about noon, and was able to carry on a normal conversation with me at full speed tonight at about 7:30.  The doctors are very confidant that he will be going home tomorrow.  My family is doing well.  I think we are all a little shaken, in fact, I'm still physically shaking. 
But there are some things I am very confidant about. 
#1-God was with us during this entire horrible day
#2-I want to spend more time loving on my family.  I have no idea how many day each of us has.
#3-I want YOU to spend more time loving on your family.  Lots of times, we let the daily things get in the way, arguments, disagreements, things from the past.  Really... if your loved one was dying, would ANY of that really matter?
#4-I love Jesus.  And He loves me!  And He loves you!  And wants you to spend eternity with Him in Heaven.  Do you know Him?  Do you love Him?  Have you accepted Him as your Lord and Savior?  If not, please consider it!  I want to spend eternity with you in Heaven too!

I LOVE that June is National Dairy Month!

Why?

Because all of this cost $10.40!!! 
32 multipacks of yogurt, and 8 gallons of milk!

Can you tell who the milk drinker is in our family?